The Healthy Marriage


Here goes a lecture link of Nouman Ali Khan. I got a link from facebook this morning, not having time right now. Will watch it later inshaAllah. What I have heard, this video should be watched by the Muslims to understand and realize some matters of life, of marriage.



40 Duas Started With Rabbana

Alhamdulillah, today I have found a nice page where 40 Duas started with Rabbana is stated.

here goes the link:
Islam awareness dot net

I am glad to bring them in here.
May Allah bless the initiators of the site with sweet rewards.
JajakAllah Khairan

Ten ways to avoid marrying the wrong person

(This post is copied from this link )
 
This is long.. but worth a read.. and a wonderful resource for working out what questions to ask at a level that really helps you know the person you are marrying.. I think the real question to ask is..
Would you want to be married to this man or this woman for all eternity because as Sh Waleed Basyouni points out in his lecture on Marriage in Islam.. this is the reality. .. and why intellectural commitment is the most important level of commitment in marriage.
There is a right way and a wrong way to get to know someone for marriage. The wrong way is to get caught up in the excitement and nuance of a budding relationship and in the process completely forget to ask the critical questions that help determine compatibility. One of the biggest mistakes that many young Muslims make is rushing into marriage without properly and thoroughly getting to know someone.

A common myth is that the duration of a courtship is an accurate enough measure of how compatible two people are. The logic follows that the longer you speak with someone, the better you will know them. The problem with that premise is that no consideration is given to how that time is spent.
Increasingly, young Muslim couples are engaging in "halal dating," which is basically socializing with each other in the company of friends and/or family. This includes going out to dinner, watching a movie, playing some sport or other leisure activity, etc. Depending on the family or culture, conversations are either minimal & chaperoned or worse, unrestricted and unsupervised. When you consider these limitations it makes one wonder when exactly, if ever at all, would the critical conversations take place? Unfortunately, for many, the answer is never and they live to suffer the consequences. If you or someone you know is in the "getting to know someone" phase, the following guide offers advice on exactly what to look for and avoid:
1) Do Not Marry Potential:
Oftentimes men consider marrying a woman hoping she never changes while a woman considers marrying a man she hopes she can change. This is the wrong approach on both accounts. Don't assume that you can change a person after you're married to them or that they will reach their potential. There is no guarantee, after all, that those changes will be for the better. In fact, it's often for the worse. If you can't accept someone or imagine living with them as they are then don't marry them. These differences can include a number of things such as ideological or practical differences in religion, habits, hygiene, communication skills, etc.
2) Choose Character over Chemistry:
While chemistry and attraction are no doubt important, character precedes them both. A famous quote follows, "Chemistry ignites the fire, but character keeps it burning." The idea of falling "in love" should never be the sole reason for marrying someone; it is very easy to confuse infatuation and lust for love. The most important character traits to look for include humility, kindness, responsibility, & happiness. Here's a breakdown of each trait: